Today is an angry day...

I usually try to stay upbeat and positive, but today is an angry day. I am furious as I face more time off work. My sixth surgery didn't go so well, so I can't see again. I'm scared to death that I'm looking at another six months out. I will have spent more time out of work and homebound than Steven will spend in jail. Where's the justice there?
Sometimes I wish I would have taken up some of the offers I got to see him taken out. But I trusted the justice system.
A justice system that is not just. There's a shocker.
I wonder what the judge would think if he was in my shoes. I wonder if he would have taken it so lightly. Or the police officer for Logan City. Officer Boehme - the man that made up his mind to find nothing from the first time I spoke with him. I wish he would lose his job - especially if he has a family he's trying to support. Then maybe he would take his job more seriously next time.
If it had been drugs THEN there would have been a sentence. Wish they had tested him. Wouldn't have been a surprise to find out it was more than alcohol in his system. It's so tempting to just leave a few gallons of everclear or vodka or peppermint schnapps where he could find it and I could pray he would just drink himself to death.
Not like me much at all, eh?
I am just feeling alone, abandoned, afraid - nothing terribly wonderful. I think I need to find my headphones and put myself out. A good guided meditation might help my attitude. I can't even describe the despair I am feeling right now. Real despair. I would rather die than endure this torture again. I wish I could call the doctor and tell him to undo everything he did to me TODAY - NOW! I can't afford this. Mentally, physically or financially. I just don't know what I'm going to do next.
Everything I want is right here, right now, and I could lose it all because of that monster. The one that walks free on the street every day.
I know I'll survive because I refuse to allow him to destroy me. Even so... today is a painful day - an angry day...

Talk about errant writers...

So, guess there's not much to say. I have been working, working, singing, working, storytelling, writing, and working some more. I just can't believe I haven't kept up in here!

NEW GOAL: Write at least one blog a week!