What happens to dreaming?

I had dreams. Really. Today has been a rough day. Not only am I exhausted because of the job I do and the route I am on this week, I have discovered that I am really tired of being mediocre. I found out two weeks ago today that my SEVENTH divorce was finalized. SEVEN. So much for that being a lucky number. It has been quite devastating, in fact. More than I let on most of the time. And driving through campus reminds me of the dreams I had that brought me back to Cache Valley. I didn't come to drive through campus, I wanted to be a part of life there! I wanted to find a job that would allow me and my children to continue our educations. Ummm.... EPIC FAIL! So then I run across a friend of mine. She's beautiful, talented, active and together, has had a tremendous impact on a good number of people in a very positive way, and has a great job and a beautiful (and intact, I might add) family. And she asked the killer question - the one that took me to the lowest of lows. "Are you doing any shows right now?" The good news is this infers that this woman is of the opinion I am good enough to be doing shows. The bad news is I'm not doing much of anything but driving around in circles and singing. Don't get me wrong, singing with the American Festival Chorus is an honor and a joy, but I still dream of being on the stage. That's what I wanted - to sing opera as a star! Of course, at this point in my life, I understand character roles and that's definitely where I would choose to be. The problem is, I'm NOWHERE and doing NOTHING. Now, even my mother tells me what a service I am to others in my current position. I love what I do. But I would love to be doing something different to bring joy to others even more! Well, this too shall pass, I'm sure. I just have to decide what to do about it now!